my favorite spot on earth

my favorite spot on earth

Thursday, January 20, 2011

Real Housewives of Beverly Hills


I know it's a little ridiculous that my post begins with two photos of Camille and Kelsey Grammer at various events. And....I know that the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills has got to be one of the most superficial shows out there, but something really struck me tonight when I was watching the season finale.

Quick Background: Last episode, Kelsey (Frasier, as I like to call him) told Camille over the phone that he was done with their marriage. She begged him to change his mind and he agreed to spend a weekend with her to try and figure things out. He subsequentially flew her out to New York for the Tony awards, but upon her arrival, she was informed that she would be staying in a hotel room alone. Then, on top of that, when she tried to get into HER OWN apartment in New York, the doorman wouldn't let her in because "he had seen Kelsey's wife come home every night and it wasn't her".

I am well aware that this show's main intention is mindless entertainment. But, when I was watching Camille reiterate the details of her failed marriage, I have to say it scared me a little and made me think a lot. This is where the photos come in - if you compare the two, they're essentially identical. Kelsey's always smiling and Camille is kind of just standing there with barely any facial expression (most likely due to her massive amounts of plastic surgery). However, the main difference here is that in the first one, they're two happily married individuals, but in the second, Kelsey's trying to get rid of Camille and a little part of Camille is emotionally dying. I mean Camille almost looks happier amidst all of her emotional turmoil than she does when things were good.

Regardless, this is where my mind kind of ran wild. First, it made me contemplate the deceptive nature of surface appearances. There's only one person who ever really knows how you feel, and thats yourself. Anyone from the outside looking in can try to understand but will never get the full story. But, I don't really want to get into the details of that. The second thing that really got to me was that this show that I consider my entertainment happened to Camille in her real life. Moreover, I can confidently say that at one point, Camille watched someone (maybe a fictional character) get abandoned by their husband for a girl 20 years younger than them, and thought to herself "eh this is just entertainment, it's not going to happen to me"....and then it did.

I mean how scary is it that our whole lives we're taught that there's only one person out there for us - but then in reality over half of the people who get married divorce. I've finally realized what in life scares me the most - it's not being lonely, it's not being financially insecure, it's not being lost; it's knowing that all my efforts had been wasted or that all the things that I have centered my life around were wrong. And moreover, I'm scared that when (or if) I have this realization, I'll have to hide it and put on a happy face. I find it so crazy that the saddest person in the world can still smile, and the happiest person in the world can still cry.

2 comments:

  1. I just happened upon your blog, and this post....It really resonates with me because I was left by the man that I centered my entire life around-- for a girl 18 years younger than him.
    I never, ever thought that this kind of thing could happen to me, though maybe in the back of my mind I didn't like to look at situations like this because I feared them somehow.
    I agree with you that the hardest part, by far, is the fact that I now question MYSELF and my judgment....because I was still madly in love, and trying to "work on things" while he had long since abandoned even the notion of being with me or the children.....
    How could I have been sooooo wrong???
    And since I secretly feared this outcome, then, did I somehow know it wasn't right subconsciously form the beginning and move forward anyway??
    And if that's the case, what would keep me from making the same mistake again?
    Can I trust myself to love anyone else.
    How perfectly awful that women who are in this situation more often question and doubt themselves than the actual person to blame....

    ReplyDelete
  2. I really hear where you're coming from too, but there's only so much advice I can give you without actually knowing your personality and/or your circumstances. I checked out your blog and I have to say, you seem like you're going to be ok. You're slowly grasping the simplicities of life while having all the necessities at hand (you may argue that having your husband is a necessity but I think your children account for your family well enough).

    Relationships come on go and everyone makes mistakes, please remember that. It's all about working through it.

    ReplyDelete